J and I spent our ritual Tuesday time in the weight room. I stuck to upper body and core stuff and gave my legs a break. It’s interesting how my body reconfigures itself to deal with a new set of stresses. When I was doing my machine lifting workout, the shoulder press gave me problems– in the middle of the lifting motion there was some kind of muscular change-up that my arms/back had a really tough time with. I gave it a try today at the old weight, and the lift was pretty easy and smooth as butter– no muscular hitch anymore. I guess I’ve strengthened whatever muscle was lacking.
After the lifting I had a date with the foam roller. My quads are very angry today, and they protested mightily at being rollered out. (That bit above the knee– whew!) I also spent some time with the back of my legs and opening up my hips (the hip yoga series over at Anytime Yoga has been really helpful for this, it’s a very tight spot for me.) Maybe someday I’ll be able to not have my legs tighten up like a Shrinkydink after runs.
There’s this blog that I love called Fit and Feminist— the author writes about the intersection of fitness and feminism with a focus on running and strength, and it’s really great. (She wrote an anniversary post that I really liked.) But. (You knew there was a but.) I have the hardest time reading this blog without being triggered to start thinking about weight loss again. It’s not the blog author’s fault– she’s a thin woman, but she writes about Health At Every Size and body acceptance too. I just have a hard time– I feel like these other people are doing cool things that I want to do too! But I’m not there. How am I different from these other people? Oh, right, I’m fat… maybe if I was smaller I could work on running marathons… And it all spirals down from there into self-loathing. I suppose my brain just sees “fitspo”, even if it’s inclusive fitspo, and goes nuts. She might not be weight-loss oriented, but plenty of her commenters are I guess… when I read comments like “I miss being as strong as I was when I was bigger, when I was bigger I had to work hard and I never had ‘easy runs'” I just want to cry.