Things are not going terribly well in my brain land. Long story short, I was startled awake by snoring at 4am, couldn’t get back to sleep, had a lot of thoughts and laid there crying until 5am, when my alarm went off to encourage me to get up and go run. Good times!
Running was the last thing I wanted to do at that point, but somehow I got out the door for a short half an hour in the swampy dawn. It wasn’t even a good run, but I felt a little better afterwards, just getting out there was a small victory. Small victories help. And it’s not like I was getting back to sleep anyway.
J is on vacation this week so I have complete flexibility in my gym schedule. Today I’m going to try and go lift after work instead of before. If I can get through this day, anyway. I may wind up crawling under my desk with a box of kleenex.
I think I’m going to have to pull back from taking care of other people and just take care of myself for a while. That’s hard enough…